A few thoughts before I set off on my journey. Before most voyages there are a few questions. Am I running from or am I going to? Am I ready for what lies ahead? What is the protocol if you lose your passport in Wuxi, China?!
A year ago I felt incredibly uncertain over my future. Getting signed by EMI had felt like an “arrival” for me. It felt like I had fulfilled something that I had set out long ago to achieve. I felt I had arrived home.
If anything losing the deal has highlighted for me how important it is not to hang on to things. I seem to search for certainties because I am not yet developed enough to give into the permanent changeability of things.
When you´ve been in the wilderness for so long as an independent musician, getting signed by a major feels like a vindication and a validation.
Thankfully life has taught me not to hang on to illusions, to certainties, to fixed things. I feel incredibly grateful for that. There is a lot that I don´t know, and much I´m yet to learn. But I am thankful for all the ways life has humbled me.
At some point during the last year, I realized that I was in the richest moment of my life as a songwriter. Songs seem to arrive in abundance when things are shaky, and my uncertainty about my musical future was not answered by a new “real life” certainty like a record deal. It has been arrived at through song - and by that the adventure of the spirit.
I have no idea why, but the songs have kept coming, and in a way that has reignited me. All I really knew was that I had to somehow try to live up to them. And that is what I am now trying to do.
The idea of “Journeys” is not about travel for me, and not dependent on whatever place I happen to be. In some ways it is more about the arrival at the realization that the human spirit is always in motion, is always potential, is not something static.
It is about the journey of the songs from birth to their audience, and about the journey the spirit makes as it accompanies them.
For now I am taking a deep breath on my last morning at home. There is a cup of tea and an Autumnal crispness in the air. It feels a fitting wind as I prepare to depart.